Time to Stop?

“I never said it would be easy. Giving up is easy.”

Maria V. Snyder

I got hit with a wave of apathy about my writing tonight.  I wondered if I had done enough, if it was time to stop.  I’m not sure where this came from – fatigue, thirst, stress – who knows?  Fortunately I quickly realized it for what it was, a trick of the Enemy to stop me from doing my work.   But it’s not time to stop my work.  This led me to a question:  When is it time to stop writing?

The first answer that comes to – and this may be the correct one – is, “Never.  Not until I’m dead, and not even then.  I’ll be writing from Heaven.”

That’s probably the correct answer, but there are other possibilities. 

I could quit my writing when I have absolutely nothing left to say, when I have no new thoughts, ideas, or experiences.  Since I experience something new every day, I don’t think that will ever happen.  Every day is in itself a new experience.  In addition, my past is a gold mine of possible writing topics.  And if I get bored with my own experiences I can write about those around me.  There is no end to stories, mine and everyone else’s. 

I could stop writing when I feel it’s time to replace it with another Purpose.  But I don’t see that happening either.  Everything of significance that I’ve done in my life has been accompanied by writing.  I’ve been writing for 40 years.  I’ve written through almost every tragedy and triumph I’ve ever had.  Why would I stop now?  What other way can I bring healing to my own soul?  How else would I learn?  How else would I remember?

My only regret about writing is that I didn’t realize all these years that I should have been taking it more seriously.  I really should have been writing every single day of my life.  I shouldn’t have missed even one day.  My heart is with my Muse, because my Muse helps me heal.  She helps me see God.  Every time I sit with her, I see God and I understand myself just a little better.  I also understand why I’m here and what I’m supposed do with my life.

So will I give this up?  Never.  I am committed to my Muse for the rest of my life.  She is my Purpose.  That’s why I take this so seriously (even though it’s fun).  The serious part isn’t the work; it’s the Enemy.  That’s a topic I haven’t addressed for a long time, but it doesn’t make the Enemy any less relevant or dangerous.  Is “dangerous” too dramatic a term.  Consider this then:  without Purpose fall in with the wrong people, the wrong situations and the wrong life.  That doesn’t mean all Purposeless people are behind bars, but they’re all in a prison of their own making.  It is only in finding and living out my Purpose that I have found freedom.  According to a recent online article, (http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=157900) having Purpose may even prevent dementia.

All I know is this:  since I’ve found my own Purpose, I’m thinking more clearly than ever.  I’m doing more work.  And I’m happier.  So, yes, I’m going to keep writing.  I’m going to Get Started and Keep Going…because it will never be time to stop.