Friday, January 17, 2014

Good Days Can Be Hard


On my bad days I seek you, on my good days I thank you, on my great days I praise you, but every day I need you, Thank you, God, for always being here for me.

Rashida Rowe


It’s been a good day and I’m grateful.  I didn’t get everything done, but it was still a nice day and, for the most part, a peaceful one.  Also, it’s still early and I thought if I took the time to write now, I could enjoy the rest of my evening with a bowl of popcorn, some comic books and an early bedtime.  I also need to do my radio show and take a walk.  And I probably should read a little more, but it’s nice to feel relaxed and peaceful.  Maybe I’ll do some of the other stuff and maybe I won’t.  Right now it just feels good to feel good.
The only problem with feeling this good is that I have absolutely no desire to write and very little to say.  At this point, writing is not cathartic; it’s an act of discipline.  In other words, I sit here and write, or more accurately type, until an idea comes along.  This is about priorities, as I mentioned in my previous blog.  It’s like going to work when I don’t really want to, not because I don’t like my job, but because there just doesn’t seem to be that much to do some days.  Writing feels like that right now:  there’s just not that much to say.
That’s the tricky part then, being in Purpose when I just don’t feel like it.  Maybe I could take a little break and have my popcorn and comics now.  Or maybe I could just keep typing until I feel like I’m done.  Steven Pressfield says that every day Resistance strikes.  It strikes every time I’m doing my work.  Every time.  Sometimes, like now, it’s worse than others.  So what do I do?  I just Keep Going.  That’s all I can do. 
If anyone is wondering what in the world I’m doing right now and why I’m rambling on and why I’m doing the writer’s version of Seinfeld’s “a show about nothing,” it’s because I’m giving readers a glimpse as to what it’s like to write sometimes.  Sometimes it’s just a job, as I also said in my previous blog.  I show up and I do my work.  It’s not always exciting or sexy.  It’s just work
Here’s the thing though.  Work is good.  I’d rather have work to do than no work at all.  In addition to writing blogs, I’ve written over 600 resumes.  My hope is that each person gets a job that they absolutely love.  However, in my current job, the philosophy is different.  I am told to help the clients get a job, any job.  Then later they might afford the luxury of getting a job they love.  Honestly, I don’t like that philosophy, but I see why it’s necessary.  This doesn’t make my ideas any less valid, but sometimes something is better than nothing.  When I hear people complain about their jobs or when I see it on Facebook, I often say, “It’s better to have to go to work than to have no work to go to.  Just ask most unemployed people.” 
So it’s better to have to commit to my Purpose than to have no Purpose to commit to.  And, yes, at the moment I feel like I have nothing to write, but here I am anyway.  That’s how Purpose works.  You show up and you do what is needed.  Maybe no one notices or cares.  It doesn’t matter.  This is what I’m supposed to be doing.  So here I am.
Tomorrow morning I will show up again.  And the next day and the next day and the next.  I Get Started and I Keep Going…on the bad days and the good.