“In the end that was the
choice you made, and it doesn't matter how hard it was to make it. It matters
that you did.”
Cassandra Clare, City
of Glass
“There are so many ways to
be brave in this world. Sometimes bravery involves laying down your life for
something bigger than yourself, or for someone else. Sometimes it involves
giving up everything you have ever known, or everyone you have ever loved, for
the sake of something greater.
But sometimes it doesn't.
Sometimes it is nothing more
than gritting your teeth through pain, and the work of every day, the slow walk
toward a better life.
That is the sort of bravery
I must have now.”
Veronica Roth, Allegiant
Normally after writing a blog, I
don’t write another for several hours or even the next day. But I just set an objective to write 29
blogs in the next six days. I have
28 to go, so I thought I should keep working on this. Of course, this goal is utterly insane, given my work
habits. Yes, my work habits have
improved, but this is asking much more of me. There’s no time to waste. I need to write now and I need to keep writing until I’ve
reached my objective.
This objective is
mine and it doesn’t excuse me from other obligations. I still have to love my children. I still have to be kind. I still have to fulfill other commitments. But I also need to treat today like a
workday. My Muse is my priority.
That’s what I prefer.
Working means just
that. I need to sit here and write
even if the ideas aren’t there yet.
I need to keep producing until I get something worth publishing. So I need to Get Started and Keep Going
and use my time well. This process
is exciting. I look forward to
seeing what will happen to me as a writer and to me as a person.
On that more
personal note, Comic Con International starts in two days. I have gone every day since 1975
(except for two years) and I plan on going two days this year, Thursday and
Sunday. That means I will have to
make some choices.
1. I
can change my mind and not go at all.
Then I can use the time to write.
2. I
can write a lot before and after I go.
3. I
can take time to write while I am there.
I have had a
love/hate affair with Comic Con for many years now. I like going and I like buying comics. I like reading comics. But they are not the priority they once
were. In the last few months I’ve
sold a lot. I hardly ever go to
comic book stores any more and in the last year and a half, I’ve spent almost
no money on new comics. When I go
to Comic Con, the crowds, the parking, the walking, and the amount of money I
spend (no matter how hard I try to
be thrifty) usually overwhelm me.
There was once a time when I dreamed of going for all five days with
unlimited amounts of time and money.
I thought I’d rent a motel room and just read comics if I wasn’t at the
Con. Now if I had unlimited
amounts of time and money, I’d rather write.
When Thursday
comes, I wonder what I’ll do. In
the past, it just drove me crazy when there was a comic convention of any kind
and I couldn’t be there. It used
to be worse. If I couldn’t go to a
comic store once a week, I was very frustrated. Now I hardly go at all, and when I do, I rarely buy
anything.
Comic Cons are a
little different because I can get a lot of things for relatively little
money. That, of course, reminds me
of my other problem: I don’t have
a lot of money to spend. I could
use a credit card, but that would be foolish. I could set a budget, but I’d have to be very
self-disciplined to stick to it – just as I have to be self-disciplined to
write 28 more blogs. “Everything
is everything,” as the old saying goes.
It’s all connected.
“What you do
anywhere, you do everywhere,” an associate of T. Harv Eker said.
So what will I
do? I’ll go to Comic Con with a
budget. I’ll spend half on Thursday
and half on Sunday. Maybe I’ll
make a game of it and see how little I can spend. (The most I’ve ever spent at a comic con was around $500. The least I’ve spent was $5. So anything is possible.) What I want is to come home feeling
that I had fun and that I got some enjoyable things to read. And I want to know that I spent my time
and money wisely.
Money is short
right now, but so is time. I want to use both well. Of the two, time is more valuable because it’s
irreplaceable. That’s why I’m
writing now. Time is also short.
That’s why I’m writing now. How I
spend my time says a lot about me. That’s why I’m writing now. That’s why I’ll always write.
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