“Never miss a good chance to shut
up.”
Will Rogers
“If a man will begin with
certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with
doubts, he shall end in certainties.”
Francis Bacon,
The
Advancement Of Learning
When one is feeling distraught,
bothered, scared, sad, or confused, it helps to know that there are healthy
ways of dealing with the pain. Most
people don’t deal with their pain in a healthy manner, so here are some things
that have helped. (And maybe this is
even similar to a blog I have written before…it feels familiar, but writing is
one of the things I’m about to recommend.)
None of these come in any particular point of order. The point is to decrease or lessen the
emotional pain, much of which is based on illusion anyway. When the pain is gone, clarity comes. So does gratitude and so does the awareness
of how much good life has to offer. This
is not to say that there is not legitimate pain or heartbreak, but it is far
less than we think.
1.
Do something.
Anything. Preferably something
physical. When the mind takes over so
much that it becomes a tyrant, then it might be time to let the body take over
for a while.
2.
Talk to someone.
Sometimes this helps. Sometimes
it doesn’t. The objective is not to
complain but to look for a solution.
Complaining might take place, but it’s not the objective. The objective is to end the pain.
3.
Do something nice for yourself. See a movie.
Read a book. Go for a walk. Take a nap.
Go for a drive. Indulge in your
hobby.
4.
Do something that aligns with your Purpose. This is why I’m writing now.
5.
Give things time. More often than not things work out if we
just let everything go. Some times the
best thing to do is nothing at all.
In addition, here
are some things not to do.
1.
Don’t attach an outcome to what is happening at
the moment. Maybe everything is fine and
no one is avoiding you. Maybe people are
just busy or having problems of their own.
Or maybe everything is not fine, but it doesn’t mean things can’t be
resolved. Maybe you aren’t losing your
job. Maybe everything will be fine. A great method of letting go of outcome
attachments is in the book, Loving What
Is by Byron Katie.
2.
Don’t complain.
See above.
3.
Don’t think about it. By this, I mean, just let it go for the
moment. Unless there’s something you can
do about it, let it go until the right time
Maybe all these
solutions seem cliché, but clichés are often based in truth. Here’s what I know for sure. I don’t want to be in any kind of pain and
often, if not always, I can choose not to be.
I can Get Started and Keep Going.
I can keep working towards that house on the beach. And I can take my own advice.
